Marie Claire » Sex

Lift Your Lust

Marie Claire — Tue, 31 Jan 2012 16:00:13 +0000

Take a Trip Down Memory Lane
The passionate kind. Rekindle nights of lust and wonderment—in other words, some of the most memorable sex you`ve had together.

Watch a Steamy Movie
Men are visual creatures. So on nights where it`s just the two of you, suggest you watch some movies together—the steamy kind.

Do It in Front of a Mirror
Men aren`t the only visual creatures— women are too. Therefore, do yourselves a favour and try doing it in front of a mirror.

You Had Me at ‘Hello’
It`s easy to lose your lust in the comfortablility of the relationship. Pretend you just met and imagine how another woman would see him and appreciate him.

Re-establish Your Sensuality
Here`s a fact we all know but is easily forgotten: confidence is sexy. For a sexy confidence boost, look at yourself naked, without studying or scrutinising your flaws.

Take It Outside
Feeling like you’re lacking stimulation from being indoors too much? Find a secluded spot for a picnic date—even if it’s just in your backyard. The risk of getting caught adds an immediate edge.

Be a Flirt
Take this step with the utmost caution —but there is no harm in a little flirting while your man is watching. I say a little, meaning no touching, no sexual gestures or heavy-hinting.

Get Tech-y
Everything revolves around modern day gadgets these days. Why not put them to good (sexual) use?

Tease and Please
Indulge in foreplay – just that. Take time to explore his body before going anywhere near his privates—but when you do, take him all the way there—orally.

What`s your Fantasy?
Exchanging sexual fantasies with your partner—where, when and with whom you would like to make love to—can be a great way to spice it up in the bedroom.

Come And Get It

Marie Claire — Sat, 31 Dec 2011 16:00:37 +0000

60 seconds
Give him a hand. By that, I mean a massage. Forget getting down and dirty in just a minute and leaving him high and dry (unless you got yourself a one-minute man). Instead, leave lingering touches that keep him wanting more.

2 Minutes
Pay attention to parting smooches—they tell the difference between grandmother pecks and ‘lover-I’ll-see-you-later’ ones. Let your lips do the talking everytime you wish to reinstate your emotional connection. With over 100 times mornerve endings than fingertips, you can imagine the desire you’re able to evoke by kissing and stimulating it.

15 minutes
It’s nice to break the pattern once in a while. For that, there’s nothing more thrilling than a quickie. While I don’t condone hit-and-run/wham-bam-thank-youma’am kind of sex on the regular, there’s nothing wrong with getting right down to business once in a while (it’s a busy world we live in these days).

If you’ve got all night
When you’re both in no rush, why not indulge, sexually and emotionally, in or shower together—there is something pure and innocent in the act of getting clean together. There’s no rush, so be a little coy, act a little innocent—even if you’ve been together for over a decade. Offer gentle assistance in getting each other cleaned up, while refraining from getting too excited. When you’re both clean and refreshed, head to the bedroom and continue getting better acquainted or re-establishing the closeness.

GREAT SEXPECTATIONS

Marie Claire — Sun, 31 Jul 2011 16:00:49 +0000

Men are so calculative. A recent discussion about their favourite activity (sex, not fishing) revealed that not only do they make mental notes on the amount of times she calls before qualifying as a stalker (unless she’s his mother or wife), they also tally the sexual ratings. Trust a retired playboy to afford us with such wise insights. This may not come as a surprise to you, but this might: whatever you think your score last night was, divided it into half. This doesn’t just apply to the women, it goes both ways—so if you thought your man was a Casanova both in and out of bed, you’re about to be enlightened.

Apparently you should double that for previous lovers in order to get their real ratings. Due to emotional what-nots, your current lover has the upper hand because of the passion that’s subconsciously added to their performance appraisal, which previous lovers have had subtracted from theirs.

If your current lover’s weighin still trumps previous ones, you’re one of the lucky few. But what if your current man has just one more box on your list to tick off—‘mindblowing sex’? Some friends have complained of their man not being big enough, or are not experienced enough compared to previous lovers, which leaves them unsatisfied (grounds for doubts about the future). I say the poor boy doesn’t know how to use his tool properly—so help him.

If you’ve had better and would like more of a good thing, tell or show him, but for goodness sake, don’t just lie there counting the ceiling cracks or fantasising about another whilst telling him he’s doing great. Why is it that women are so scared they might bruise a man’s ego by telling him what to do when he’s naked? From what I’ve discovered, between the sheets is the only place men don’t mind being told what to do—it’s driving force behind every cougar’s triumph: experience.

Encourage him when he’s doing things right when it comes to kissing and sex—or even better, tell him how you like it. Another way to do this would be by role playing. Assume an authoritative figure like a teacher or a driving instructor—guide him to work that stick right (pun intended). After all, I’m sure he’d like to know the placement of bodyparts on the female anatomy—and our erogenous zones.

Natural Pleasure

Marie Claire — Thu, 30 Jun 2011 16:00:07 +0000

Save the planet and your sex life. Yes, as Anna Thomas reports, it’s possible to have sustainable sex.

1. Since you’re going to have your eyes shut half of the time anyway, why not turn the lights off and conserve energy? Or if you really need to see what’s going on the whole time, indulge in intimacy in broad daylight.		2. Do your part for water conservation by showering together. Massaging suds on each other makes
3. Excuse my language, but screw without screwing the planet. Petroleum based lubricants are contributing to our planet’s diminishing natural resources. Source for safe lubrication that’s water-based and incorporates essential oils instead of petrochemicals, artificial ingredients, parabens and glycerin.		4. Toys shouldn’t be hazardous to health (choking hazards aside), yet many are made with toxic chemicals that do no good for the Earth, either. Look out for toys that are made of Silicone or Elastomer, as both are non-toxic and skin friendly – but make sure that it’s Phthalate free. Phthalates are often used to soften PVC vinyls and have been linked to obesity, cancers, low sperm count, and fetal and reproductive system effects. Alternatively, look for (these may sound strange) phthalate-free, safe toys that are made from stainless steel, mahogany or glass.
5. Speaking of toys, does it really need to be battery operated? If you must use up non-human energy, take landfill-clogging batteries out of the equation and opt for a solar powered one.

Do It Like A Superstar

Marie Claire — Wed, 01 Jun 2011 09:22:11 +0000

Tantric

Sting and his wife Trudie have famously admitted to exercising tantric sex that over the course of several hours, will provide orgasms that will shake you to your core. Actress Heather Graham also shares their view since saying that the ritual is about “deeper levels of connection.” She gave it a go while filming The Guru. “The idea is that you let the whole thing build very slowly until finally you merge with your partner. It works for me,” said Graham in a separate interview.

Mile-High Club

It is said that Sir Richard Branson lost his virginity on a plane – hence, bringing about his Virgin Atlantic airline name (oh, the irony!). John Travolta and his wife Kelly Preston, Ralph Fiennes and Carmen Electra have also admitted to being members of the Mile High Club. We just hope that the former Grease star and licensed pilot don’t do it when he’s maneuvering his Lear Jet.

Taking It From Behind

Pamela Anderson, like the true VIP she is, enjoys going through the back door. Once asked if she and partner engages in a variety of sexual positions including taking it from behind, the busty blonde brazenly admitted, “All of the above.”

Battery Operated

Victoria Beckham and Lindsay Lohan have both been spotted buying sex toys, and this opens the door to many others who have previously cowered at the thought of using instruments that may well enhance their sexual experience.

Accidentally On Purpose

Marie Claire — Wed, 02 Mar 2011 04:04:13 +0000

In this age of modern technology, it’s hard to pinpoint what exactly counts as cheating. Does it count if I Facebook message a guy friend (who I once had a fling with and still harbour a little crush for), ‘Happy Birthday’? What about tweeting a (good looking) colleague who sometimes brings an extra coffee to work, just for me? What about sending him a picture of myself via my mobile phone—of course I’d make an itsy bit of effort to capture a good angle—but that’s not cheating. Is it?
Years ago, tongues and tabloids were set aflame by Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie. The Hollywood hunk lashed out against allegations that he had an affair with his Mr & Mrs Smith co- star while he was still married to Jennifer Aniston, saying in one interview, “What people don’t understand is that we filmed for a year. We were still filming after Jen and I split up”. Jolie had also denied being the cause of Brad Pitt’s divorce with Aniston…until her statement in the New York Times that “not a lot of people get to see a movie where their parents fell in love” in reference to the ‘chemistry’ she shared onscreen opposite Pitt in the movie.
Like many spouses before him, Pitt’s definition of what constitutes an affair might be a little misguided. Dr. Edward Chan, a couple’s therapist and psychologist with over fourteen years of experience in helping troubled relationships, says that cheating doesn’t necessarily have to involve sex, but “anything that violates a partner’s trust
through physical (sexual) or emotional means.”
“Committed partners cheat because they have subconscious needs that are unmet by their present partners. Consequently, they spend time and energy seeking satisfaction for those needs. Very often, it is mostly to do with things like being listened to and attended to,” he says.

Rocking The Boat

Sean P. Diddy Combs was caught red handed when Jennifer Lopez overheard his steamy phonecalls to another woman. Eva Longoria stumbled upon her husband Tony Parker’s hidden electronic information of the affair he was having with his teammate’s wife. Today’s world has afforded individuals with different ways and portals to be unfaithful—is it acceptable to keep regular contact with an ex on Facebook? Just how much can you talk to a friend of the opposite sex before it counts as cheating?

If you’re basing it purely on logic, then, no, having friends that happen to be guys isn’t cheating. Then again, may I remind you of a scene from He’s Just Not That Into You? Bradley Cooper and Scarlett Johansson are by the pool after he attends her yoga class and he awkwardly says that he doesn’t do ‘this’ because he is married. So they settle on being friends—right before she decides to go skinny dipping while he watches. Here lies the proof that if you secretly like someone and attempt to make them fancy you back, that’s already a leap in the wrong direction. By definition, cheating doesn’t just imply sleeping with someone else, it is deceiving—yourself as well as others—into believing that there is nothing more than what you have chosen to reveal.

IF YOU SECRETLY LIKE SOMEONE AND ATTEMPT TO MAKE THEM FANCY YOU BACK, THAT’S ALREADY A LEAP IN THE WRONG DIRECTION

There are two sides to every issue. You might find there is nothing wrong with being friendly with someone you find attractive, as long as there is no kissing, intimate touching and sex. Thus, there is no harm in one on one lunches and catch up sessions. Perhaps, for the good of your relationship with your boyfriend or husband, you’d rather not tell him—just so he doesn’t get insecure about it. This is the bud of the blooming problem. The feeling of needing to hide something you think ‘there is nothing wrong with’ goes hand in hand with lying.